I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize
