You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
Randomize
