This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
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