Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
You need to stop texting me at SEVEN in the morning. It wakes my one night stands up and makes for the awkward talk way too early.
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
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