Im at strip club and am horny
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
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