they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
Randomize
