I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Using a miniature baseball bat to kill a mosquito in the house may not have been the most efficient or safest way, but that thing is fucking dead. However, so are three wine glasses, a lamp, and my baseball bat privileges. Worth it.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
Randomize
