Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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