when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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