oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
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