Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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