His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
this must be what syphilis tastes like
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
Randomize