Screwed.edu
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize
