Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Randomize
