She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
Randomize
