im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
Randomize
