Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
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