just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
