we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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