I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Randomize
