Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Randomize
