Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
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