**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
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