Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
Randomize
