This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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