it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
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