CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
