I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize
