That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
