this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
YAS. BRING CRAB.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Randomize
