So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
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