No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
