how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
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