Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
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