Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Babe, the 4 years we've been together have been amazing. Will you marry me?
are you seriously doing this over text message
hahaha no, but i am dumping you.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
Just pee around me
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
Randomize
