Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
