So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
