so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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