You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
Randomize
