Apparently you make a good broom.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
Randomize
