Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
Randomize