I hate all girls vehemently.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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