No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Randomize
