the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize