I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
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