I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Randomize
