shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Randomize
