so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
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