My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Having a random hookup so left but love u
too bad you live with your parents still
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Randomize
