She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
I am mentally ready for anal.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Randomize
