I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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