I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
